Today is my wife Kristen and my 14th wedding anniversary.
We’ve reached the amount of time being married where both of us have to do the math to remember how many years we’ve been married. Maybe that says more about our math skills than our number of years, yet we’re in it together!
One of the traits that’s allowed our marriage to be successful over the past 14 years is our appreciation and support of who the other person is.
Kristen knows my tendency for logic. I want to know the “how” of things. She indulges that inquisitiveness, even though it’s not her natural style.
Often when she has something to tell me – especially if it’s something new – she will preface the conversation with “I’m going to tell you all I know.”
Recently, a colleague offered an investment opportunity to Kristen. When Kristen told me about it, she started the conversation with “I know you’re going to want to know more… let me tell you what I know and then you can go ask your questions to the person that presented it.”
That saves me from going down the questions rabbit hole only to be unsatisfied because there’s no more answers. It also saves Kristen the frustration of having to answer questions she doesn’t know. She says to me often “You always have more questions than I have answers.”
My natural learning style is auditory digital. Of the main learning styles: visual, auditory, kinesthetic, it’s a lesser discussed style. It means that I learn by talking stuff out. This usually happens in my head and sometimes it’s out loud.
She gives me the space to talk things out. I formulate ideas as I speak, which allows me to stream-of-conscious talk to gain clarity. It also creates a tendency for my stories to meander. Most of the time, she’ll talk it out with me and participate in my conversation. Of course, I know “okay Carter, we got it” means shut up and move on!
My inquisitiveness for logic and talking things out are not natural for her. She’s a quick driver & very focused.
She is purposeful to allow me to be myself and is very supportive. Our relationship is a safe space because of it.
And, she drives our family forward. She pushed us to buy our first home, our first investment property, many of our vacations and probably where to eat tonight.
She’s the doer to my planner. The “git-r-dun” to my “strategery.”
I appreciate how hard she works to make our marriage a success. I feel like I put her first. I know she puts me first.
So today we celebrate us. We celebrate what has got us here and know that it’s simply the foundation that will allow us to grow for many years to come.
Love You, Kristen! Happy anniversary! Cheers to many more!